Issue #253, April 2010
featuring Scribblenauts 2 (DS), Super Mario Bros 3 (NES), WarioWare DIY (DS), New Super Mario Bros Wii (Wii)

Not that anybody listened to what I said, but I considered Scribblenauts a massive disappointment. While the core functionality – spell it and it appears – was amazing, the actual game sort of sucked. Controlling Maxwell was abysmal, leading to ridiculous, obnoxious deaths. The snapping camera was terrible, also leading to ridiculous, obnoxious deaths. The “par” mode for the levels rewarded simplistic solutions, rather than encouraging creativity. But Scribblenauts quickly became one of those games that you dare not criticize because it represented a bold new vision and gave new life to the DS in non-kiddie circles.

Unless, of course, you are the developer. Then you can criticize the first installment and, more importantly, fix what went wrong.

This is all very good news, as it promises to raise an incredible concept apart from the serious flaws that ruined it.

Scribblenauts 2 (which does not yet have an official title) has two ways to control Maxwell – d-pad AND touch screen – whereas the first game only has a dastardly touch screen option. This is all I needed to hear: “…you can move Maxwell directly via the Control Pad while using the touch screen to move the camera and interact with objects.” Well, duh.

The camera will no longer snap back to Max after a few seconds. Nintendo Power points out how “annoying” this was in the first game, but I don’t recall that affecting the game’s 9-out-of-10 score. Objects now have improved physics and weight, plus you can attach ropes to any part of an object rather than certain pre-selected vertices.

The par system is out and a lot more post-level merits (sort of like Achievements) are in. The level editor is back and cleaned up. And while the game only has 120 levels – compared to 220 in the first – the new levels are more complex and less regimented into types of action vs puzzle boards.

That’s all fixing what came before. Scribblenauts 2, however, has a very big trick up its sleeve: 10,000 adjectives. The original game has 10,000 nouns (which return in the sequel, plus more!) that you can now modify with words like “fiery,” “supersonic” and “magnetic.” Take a look at this poor cow:

How long until we can solve Scribblenauts puzzles by writing complete sentences?

Seems like I no longer have anything to complain about. Scribblenauts 1 sold a million copies, but #2 is going to be the one to get.

SHOCKING, BREAKING NEWS: Will LEGO Harry Potter cure the franchise?

There is one sentence in the three page LEGO Harry Potter: Years 1-4 preview that raises my interest and expectations higher than I could have previously imagined:

If the two players happen to wander away from each other, the game automatically switches to a split-screen mode, so everyone is free to explore wherever they’d like.”

Does this mean that LEGO Harry Potter is about to solve the age-old problem that has dogged the LEGO ____ series since the very first Star Wars edition? To wit: the games’ hateful implementation of co-op? After Traveller’s Tales ignored the problem in this generation’s LEGO Indiana Jones and LEGO Batman, dare I be optimistic that Potter could break the curse?

LEGO Harry Potter also will give the hub world more substance, which is a direction the series has always been moving towards, with the central Hogwarts zone sounding more like a sandbox game. Even speaking as somebody who has read all the books, I’m astounded that the Wii version will have 140 playable characters (but I’m not naive enough to think that various costume changes for Harry, Ron and Hermione won’t account for a significant percentage). LEGO Harry Potter is scheduled for May 2010 on Wii and DS.

I’m calling it. Sonic 4 is going to have playable characters other than Sonic.

We’ve got to read between the lines here. Despite that cute internet reveal that crossed off all of Sonic’s least-loved supporting cast members. Despite the triumphal roar that preceded the videos where only Sonic is seen in Sonic 4. Despite the Sonic franchise being turned into a punching bag of playability missteps and bizarro alternate universe storylines. Sonic 4 is going to have the friends as playable characters.

Not Episode 1, of course. Multiple times, Dimps frontman Takashi Iizuka becomes coy when pressed by Nintendo Power on the topic of playable characters. “We want to keep it simple with this episode,” (emphasis mine.) “You’ll have to wait and see what happens next as the Sonic the Hedgehog 4 saga progresses.”

Optimists in the audience can presume that Tails and Knuckles will appear just as they did back in the Genesis line. Back then, they were not game-killers at all, just signs of the apocalypse to come… and they did not get in Sonic’s way, gameplay-wise. Naturally, the optimists in the audience are the group keeping Sonic games alive at retail. The rest of us can eagerly anticipate Episode 2 to hand the reins to Amy Rose and her massive hammer.

(Sonic fan art by k1llerRabbit of deviantart.com.)

There’s a little to be worried about with WarioWare DIY.

I’m still jazzed for this one, and I hope to make some seriously crazy custom microgames. But some weaknesses of the game have begun to poke through the nose-picking, cow-milking, retro-flogging veneer.

NP is depressingly vague about how sharing works. In the review, they state that you can only download custom microgames from Nintendo or from friends. In the article, they mention being able to connect to the online community and “exchange microgames, comics and records with other DIY users.” So is there a LittleBigPlanet-style potluck database or not?

NP also does not outline how this all works with the WiiWare play-only interface, WarioWare DIY Showcase. Can I make a microgame on the DS, and then upload it to the Showcase for my Wii Friends to enjoy (assuming they also own Showcase)?

The review suggests that the only interface for custom microgames involves tapping… this means we can’t make microgames that allow for button or d-pad input. I’m assuming this is so the games work equally well on DS or Wii, since the Wii Remote lacks buttons. Still, bleah.

The nine page article does a great job of introducing the DIY creation tools, and I liked the examples cooked up by the NP editorial crew. But the lack of specific sharing info could end up heralding the dagger at the heart of Wario.

Download Staff Picks: Blaster Master Overdrive (WiiWare), Mega Man 10 (WiiWare), Dark Void Zero (DSiWare), Number Battle (DSiWare)

And that’s the first time anybody on the internet has mentioned Dark Void in months.

Top scoring Wii review: Sakura Wars: So Long, My Love, 7.5 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Pokemon HeartGold / SoulSilver, 9.5
Lowest rated Wii review: Calling, 5.0
Lowest rated DS review: Crime Scene, 5.0

Also reviewed for DS this month, Nintendo Power gave WarioWare DIY 8.5, and 8.0s for Infinite Space, Squishy Tank and Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey.

So, two under-the-radar Wii games I have been championing – Calling and Fragile Dreams – ended up with low NP reviews, 5.0 and 5.5, respectively. Sorry about that.

Lost in Shadow is still coming! – Many months ago, NP showed off a looker of a game in Lost in Shadow. The premise being that you need to control a light source and create shadows to traverse platformer levels. Originally thought to be a spring Wii release, it is now bumped to Fall 2010.

The usual fanboy suspects. – NP asked readers to reveal what unannounced game release would make 2010 “the best year ever.” As you would expect, there are callouts for Mother 3 and Starfox… but some brave souls asked for another Paper Mario, a sequel to The World Ends With You, and a new Punch-Out!! with (more) classic Nintendo characters. Dalton B. asked for Pikmin 3 and he seems to be getting his wish.

Earthworm Jim coming to DSiWare – The DSiWare Earthworm Jim game is a remake of the first one, with a little graphical polish and an optional easy mode. It will also use the DSi camera to put your face beside Jim’s and match his expression. Natal is trumped again!

Who is the audience here? – This year the DS is getting not one but TWO River City sports games. You know, like the NES meme-faves River City Ransom and Super Dodge Ball? Look for River City Soccer Hooligans this May and River City Super Sports Challenge in July.

I did not know this. – Game composer Tommy Tallarico is cousins with Aerosmith’s Stephen Tyler. And Tommy might be vegan.

What the hell is Squishy Tank? – How can we have never heard of a game that gets an 8.0? Because it’s a DS match-three puzzle game. Squishy Tank rates high on personailty, throwing in dialogue that makes fun of Metal Gear Solid and Fallout 3.

Again, why? – Is there any reason we can’t get a Wii Classic Controller that skips plugging in to the stupid Remote accessory port? Monster Hunter Tri will come with a very sleek Classic Controller Pro… but it still plugs into the damn Remote. Am I the only guy that would pay $30-40 for a Classic Pro that comes with its own Bluetooth?

Next month in Nintendo Power… a “snazzy new world reveal” that might just be the aforementioned Pikmin 3, although the teaser page has a big boring Mario picture. And I’m still waiting on that low Red Steel 2 review.

Issue #252, March 2010
featuring Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver (DS), Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands (Wii), Tournament of Legends (Wii)

Nintendo Power’s six-page look at Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver does not do much to impress you that the games have received wild and necessary improvements. Sure, the graphics are better than a Game Boy Color game! Sure, the sound is better! Much of the article simply rattles off the features that Gold and Silver added ten years ago… like the Steel and Dark types, a real-time clock, held items, and a daycare for breeding. Aside from WiFi play (and I assume the Global Trading Station), there is little talk of features cribbed from modern DS mega-hits Pokemon Pearl and Diamond. At this stage it would have been nice to be reassured that HeartGold and SoulSilver was going to follow that legacy rather than just be a remastered port.

But then there’s the Pokewalker.

Of course I had the Pokemon Pikachu 2 GS back in the day. A combination virtual pet and pedometer, the PP2GS recorded my steps and beamed info into my Pokemon Silver by way of the GBC’s infrared receiver. Flash forward ten years later and you’re about to see me do that all over again with the Pokewalker, a combination virtual pet and pedometer that will do the same with HeartGold and SoulSilver. Although the PP2GS was a separate purchase, Nintendo wisely has the Pokewalker bundled with every copy of HeartGold and SoulSilver. Naturally, this bumps the price up to a slightly dizzying $40.

NP describes a little of the Pokewalker’s functionality. You can transfer one of your pokemon from the DS game to the ‘walker. As you walk around in the real world, the pokemon walks along its own Route… your steps generate Watts which are then used to unlock new Routes back in HeartGold and SoulSilver (does this mean the new Johto map will have multiple new roads and shortcut paths that you’re expected to uncover with the Pokewalker?) Watts can also find items or catch pokemon on the Pokewalker itself, making it kind of like a highly-focused, miniaturized version of the Pokemon concept itself. The most important feature is that pokemon can gain levels after doing their time in your ‘walker.

Oh yes, I shall be levelling up all workday. Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver will see release on March 14. Check to see if your local store is offering the preorder bonus of a little Ho-oh or Lugia plastic figure!

Would the Kingdom Hearts fan community that orchestrated this please stand up?

Two months ago Nintendo Power opened up voting for the annual Nintendo Power Awards. As in previous years, they have separated the winners into two halves: one set chosen by the NP editorial staff and one selected by the online popular vote. Predictably, New Super Mario Bros Wii and Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks won the magazine’s Wii and DS Games of the Year, with NSBMW also taking Overall Game of the Year. But in the online poll, voters chose Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days as both DS GOTY and Overall GOTY, defeating both Mario and Zelda by a large margin. Furthermore, Kingdom Hearts swept all seven categories in which it was nominated!

Seeing that Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days was one of the most tedious DS games I played in 2009 (and I played Blue Dragon Plus!), I smell a very dedicated fan community somewhere that rose to the occasion and swamped the vote.

It’s a fair play; online fansites are powerful beasts packed with passionate voices. I just wish a more deserving game had felt the love.

Allow me to draw your attention to this huge blank space.

Not even Nintendo Power can find enough to say about Data East Arcade Classics to fill out roughly two inches of blank column space.

Are you a bad enough dude to own a crappy retro collection?

Nintendo Power has No More Heroes 2 all wrong.

They gave it a 9.0, which is a pretty shockingly high score. The cynic in me wants to say that NMH2 was the beneficiary of a +2 point bonus simply for being an M-rated, shock-filled, mature-o-fest, like the high scores awarded to The Conduit and Madworld. As much as I love No More Heroes, #2 is not better than #1 (which NP gave an 8 out of 10.) Here’s why.

Much has been said about NMH2 removing the empty, no-frills third-rate-GTA overworld. While in the original, yes the motorcycle was a giant slug and yes the city was largely empty, at least it gave us a sense that this was an actual, explorable location that added to our understanding of Travis Touchdown’s world. In NMH3, every single shop, minigame and level is selectable from a menu. This is a boring, half-assed way out of the problem. The solution is to make the city better not erase it entirely. NMH2 sacrifices immersion and believability by reducing the experience into a disconnected series of quests chosen from a menu.

Do not believe anyone who tells you the 8-bit-styled minigames “are a treat.” Nintendo Power, hilariously, claims to have spent hours playing them yet refers to them as “often fun, sometimes frustrating, and always rewarding.” Often fun? WTF? There’s a key word choice there – “often” – that should notify sensitive readers that NP does not want to admit that these minigames are confusingly explained and poorly controlled.

NP also brings up alternate playable character Shinobu and says her controls are “not as solid as I’d like.” No kidding. Shinobu’s jump might as well contain a random coin-flip generator that determines if you’re actually going to land on the platform you intended. It is terribly loose… and naturally her levels contain quite a bit of vertical scaling. So you’ll be doing a lot of vertical falling.

I love this series. The cutscenes and dialogue and characters are just as good in NMH2 as they were in NMH1. The combat is fast and fun, combining ridiculous light saber attacks with equally ridiculous wrestling drops. The bosses are bizarre and wonderful (although many seem to be purposefully cheap in order to make a metatextual point.) But the loss of the overworld, the obfuscation of the minigames, and some awful control choices (don’t even bring up the motorcycle prelude to the Ryuji boss fight!) add up to some major subtractions to this installment.

A Decade of Nintendo.

The “Best of the Decade” article (quiet, decade-counting purists!) has a great timeline featuring over 100 important games from the N64 through WiiWare. Out of 103 titles, I own 69 of them, which puts me at a pretty great fanboy rating.

According to the timeline, the biggest drought of major releases from from February 2005 to August 2005. And even then, there’s not a single non-DS title noted until November 2006. Looking at that, I’m not surprised that the gaming populace was ready for Nintendo to abandon ship and go software-only in the year prior to the Wii’s ascendance.

Also, your decade of NP Overall GOTYs is as follows:

• 2000: Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask (N64)
• 2001: Super Smash Bros Melee (GameCube)
• 2002: Metroid Prime (GameCube)
• 2003: Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker (GameCube)
• 2004: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes (GameCube)
• 2005: Resident Evil 4 (GameCube)
• 2006: The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (Wii)
• 2007: Super Mario Galaxy (Wii)
• 2008: Super Smash Bros Brawl (Wii)
• 2009: New Super Mario Bros Wii (Wii)

Yeah, I believe this letter.

Nobody in their right mind would suggest that the last decade of Sonic games was better than the last decade of Mario games. But I somehow doubt that, two months ago, a die-hard Sonic fan suddenly discovered the Wonders of Mario after reading NP’s “250 Reasons to Love Nintendo” feature… and then fired off a lame “I was wrong” letter in time for issue #252 to see print.

Download Staff Picks: Castlevania: The Adventure ReBirth (WiiWare), Pilotwings (SNES), The Oregon Trail (DSiWare)

Top scoring Wii review: No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle, 9.0 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth, 8.0
Lowest rated Wii review: Super Monkey Ball Step & Roll, 5.5
Lowest rated DS review: Ragnarok DS, 5.0

Also this month, Nintendo Power gave Sonic and SEGA All-Stars Racing 8.0 on Wii and 6.0 on DS, Endless Ocean: Blue World (Wii) hit 7.5, and Shiren the Wanderer (Wii) managed a 6.5.

No more dangling Remotes! – The $80 official Tatsunoko vs Capcom arcade stick controller from Mad Catz plugs into the Wii Remote instead of having it’s own wireless connectivity. What the hell man. Is the wireless tech really so cost-prohibitive that we all have to suffer with dangly loose Remotes hanging off our fighting sticks and Classic Controllers?

Whuh-oh. – When discussing the swordplay controls in the upcoming Red Steel 2, NP says “Wii Sports Resort is closer to the kind of sword control that many of us had in mind.”

Your marching orders for Second Quarter. – This spring, you’re going to get WarioWare DIY Showcase for WiiWare and you’re going to enjoy my handmade WarioWare levels I created with WarioWare DIY for DS.

Yeah, we noticed that. – NP points out that Castlevania: The Adventure ReBirth for WiiWare has no save option. But according to New Super Mario Bros Wii, that’s okay because it honors the memory of classically difficult retro titles, right?

Next month in Nintendo Power… the goods on WarioWare DIY, plus a look back at Super Mario Bros 3. Plus, Red Steel 2 gets a review score of 7.0 or lower.

Issue #251, February 2010
featuring NBA Jam (Wii), Ghost Trick (DS), Lord of the Rings: Aragorn’s Quest (Wii), Epic Mickey (Wii), Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey (DS)

I’m sorry, but the new NBA Jam looks ridiculous. The visual gimmick involves pasting real life basketball star head 2D cut-outs over 3D bodies. Yes, I fully understand that the goofy style is intentional, even appropriate given the series’ pedigree of outlandish arcade action, but that still doesn’t help these screenshots from looking like a bunch of lousy Photoshops. We’re really going to need to see this one in motion to get it.

The article says each player will have seven faces, clipped out of actual court action shots. Doesn’t seem like enough to me. Every dunk replay is going to look like this:

Kobe! Eyes on the ball, not the cheerleaders!

Why NBA Jam in 2010? Creative Director Trey Smith puts points on the board when he says “We know people aren’t going to Wii for their simulation sports titles.” Even as a non-sports fan, I made an “ooooh” face when I read that one.

NP pulls their usual bit where they pretend to be skeptical about the game’s motion controls, delineate every possible gesture map in painful detail, and then announce at the end that the waggle is “extremely responsive and intuitive.” I bet I can find the exact same story arc during their Avatar preview.

There are very strong hints that the new NBA Jam with uphold the series tradition of including hidden (often political) playable team members. And yes, we are all expected to start saying “boomshakalaka” again, as if we never stopped.

Like I said, this is one game where a bunch of static screenshots are not going to sell it. I can hear mouthbreathing HD fanboys copy/pasting these screens into their WII SUX forum posts right now. We’re going to need to see movement and gameplay to determine if the hokey charm comes off in the final product. EA Sports has the game booked for a fall 2010 release.

Check out this great gag:

Now you’re leveraging the inherent advantages of print media with power.

I present to you the next ten mature-themed Wii games that will be overlooked, undersold and outright ignored in 2010.

• No More Heroes: Desperate Struggle (January)
• Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon (March)
• Red Steel 2 (March)
• Calling (Spring)
• Trauma Team (Spring)
• Sakura Wars: So Long, My Love (Spring)
• Lost in Shadow (Summer)
• The Grinder (TBD)
• Sin and Punishment 2 (TBD)
• Monado: Beginning of the World (TBD)

I’m not saying these are bad games. I’m not saying these are good games. I’m saying that, for better or for worse, New Super Mario Bros Wii will outsell all of them combined. Lately it seems like the vast majority of Wii owners show up for one, maybe two games a year… and those titles above have no chance of being on that sales receipt. Even those that deserve it.

And by the way, every fiber in my body is telling me to add Metroid: Other M to that list. Nintendo has a long hard road to elevate Metroid Anything into the top sellers category.

Shadow the Hedgehog fan is into Shadow the Hedgehog

In case you think I’ve been too hard on Nintendo lately, with all my complaints about a lackluster first-party lineup since Fall 2008, here it is in Nintendo Power’s own words:

Boomshakalaka.

Download Staff Picks: Tales of Monkey Island 4 (WiiWare), Cave Story (WiiWare), Blaster Master (NES), Super Mario Kart (SNES)

Top scoring Wii review: Tatsunoko vs Capcom: Ultimate All-Stars, 9.0 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Bejeweled Twist, 8.5
Lowest rated Wii review: Pinball Hall of Fame: The Gottlieb Collection, 6.5
Lowest rated DS review: Glory of Heracles, 7.0

There was only four reviews this month!

I am THIS CLOSE to being interested – Sonic and Sega All-Stars Racing will feature kart tracks based on Sonic, Billy Hatcher, House of the Dead and Super Monkey Ball (among others, I’m sure.) The game will support multiple controller schemes, but NP does not mention if that includes the GameCube controller.

You’re confusing popularity with relative rarity – Reader Cynthia sent in a picture of her husband in a Mario costume at Disney World, claiming he was “more popular than the Disney characters.” As soon as people start paying this couple $100+ to hang out for a day, I’ll believe it.

Factory surplus passes the savings on to you – Nintendo releases pink and blue Wii Remotes on February 14. Just like last fall’s black Remote, these pastel beauts will come with the MotionPlus plug. Unlike the black bundle, the MotionPlus will be white and the controller jacket will be transparent. Which makes the whole assembly look more like a condom than ever.

And I thought the Great Fairy was creepy before – NP profiles Jennifer Howard, a cosplayer with some great Nintendo-themed costumes in her arsenal. She doesn’t own a sewing machine!

So it begins – The Artoon-developed, Nintendo-published Span Smasher will REQUIRE MotionPlus. It also includes an “adorable piece of living fruit.”

Collector alert – This issue includes a trading card for Tatsunoko vs Capcom, attached to an ad that promises more cards available at GameStop with your preorder.

Me too! – Warren Spector, despite being well into Epic Mickey, says his favorite Disney character is Scrooge McDuck.

The Professor would be sorely disappointed – Lord of the Rings: Aragorn’s Quest will allow two player co-op by way of jumping Gandalf in for P2, regardless of whether Gandalf was involved in that part of the story or not.

I love interview tidbits like this – Shu Takumi, of Ace Attorney and the upcoming Ghost Trick, on the spirit world: “Actually, I don’t have any real interest in the occult or in supernatural phenomenon, nor do I really know much about those types of things.”

Next month in Nintendo Power… one big headline feature: Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver!

Issue #250, January 2010
featuring Mega Man 10 (WiiWare), No More Heroes 2 (Wii), Shin Megami Tensai: Strange Journey (DS)

The thing about the “250 Reasons to Love Nintendo” article is that it’s just nostalgic fluff. It’s not a reasonable list in any way, so there’s no point in waging fanboy war over the lack of enough Kid Icarus mentions.

The big 250 kicks off with the Top 20 heroes. Naturally, Mario-Link-Samus make the top three, and just about the entire Smash Bros cast is scattered throughout. Some of the inclusions seem hinged entirely upon 2009 releases across the Nintendoverse, like Little Mac and Earthworm Jim. About half the list is third-party characters, which is either a nice showing or desperate pandering, depending on which side of the snark fence you sit. Viewtiful Joe? Really?

The top 10 villain list hilariously kicks off with misspelling the word “villain.” Featuring pretty much the bad guys paired with the heroes on the preceding list, the only surprise is that Donkey Kong made both sections. THAT’S TWO COUNTS OF DONKEY KONG IN THE 250, AND WE’RE ONLY THREE PAGES IN.

The section showcasing various controller innovations – like the first d-pad, shoulder buttons, analog stick and rumble – does the poor GameCube no favors. It only gets a single nod, for having the first two-click shoulder buttons. Nintendo Power’s hatred of the Cube continues! They could have thrown out a Wavebird mention (although they are listing only firsts, and the Wavebird wasn’t the first wireless controller… just the first that freaking worked), or they could have brought up using the GBA as a GameCube controller.

Just to prove the mag isn’t serious about actually listing 250 separate bits of Nintendo coolness, note that they include the seven Tetris shapes, the three parts of the Triforce, the seven Koopa Kids, and each Ninja Turtle as part of the count.

Here’s a rundown of some nice mentions that maybe you would not have expected:

- Henry Hatsworth in the “Moustaches” section
- The Elite Beat Agents given individual credit
- Rainbow Road and the Blue Shell listed under “Things We Love to Hate”
- Mega Man’s Rush making the “Sweet Rides” list
- Two drops of Final Fight, one for Mayor Haggar’s ’stache and one for the meat power-up
- Final Fantasy VI’s opera scene
- Klonoa and Astro Boy: Omega Factor on the “Grand Finales” best-of

What’s the best part of the Mega Man 10 poster image?

Is it the super-casual way he’s blasting that robot skull?

Is it the gun-filled robot dragon?

Is it that MM artwork has officially and purposefully crossed over into Strong Bad-esque parody?

Coming to WiiWare this March, Mega Man 10 will continue the series in retro-NES style. Proto Man will be a playable character from the start, and Capcom has a secret third character in the roster. Old time fans wmay like the return of the Yashichi healing item. MM10 will again feature in-game achievements (NINTENDO: MAKE THIS STANDARD) and DLC.

MM10 will also have an Easy mode, no doubt pointed directly at gamers like me who have no patience for the franchise’s punishing, frustrating difficulty. Easy mode amps Mega Man’s attack and defense, slows down enemies and even provides extra platforms in certain areas. NP likens Easy mode to Mega Man 2 and 3, but notes that the game will retain Mega Man 9’s level of play for those who want it.

Here’s your next quirky-ass WiiWare game to track.

Not into Bonsai Barber? Not interested in Muscle March? Not hip enough for the BIT.TRIP series? How’s this screenshot montage grab you…

It’s Tomena Sanner, a side-scroller that combines a simplistic look with ridiculous goals. It reminds me a lot of the DS Feel the Magic games, put on a full Katamari rager. In this WiiWare game, you play as average Japanese salaryman Hitoshi Susumu. Hitoshi just wants to get to his after-office dance party. The captions you see in the black boxes are part of the actual game.

Tomena Sanner features four-player splitscreen and is expected sometime in early 2010.

Follow along as I read about Calling…

Please start paying attention to No More Heroes: Desperate Struggle now.

I know, I know, they’re remaking the first NMH for PS3/360 and it will be all shiny and beautiful. But that’s no reason to skip the (as yet) Wii-exclusive sequel, No More Heroes: Desperate Struggle. To wit:

- The empty-GTA overworld is gone, making this game No More Running.
- The minigames are all done in NES-style graphics.
- It features a fake anime called Pure White Lover Bizarre Jelly.
- There’s a sidegame where you help your pet cat lose weight.
- One boss fight features giant monster Power Rangers-style 2D fighting.
- The stylized graphics of the original game have been upgraded.

Between all the easy tosses to nerd culture (girl anime! giant robots! lightsabers! masked wrestlers! NES graphics! sarcastic script!) and the satisfying hardcore violence, No More Heroes is doing everything it can to earn your purchase and bust up the family-friendly Wii paradigm. The game is booked for January 2010.

Download Staff Picks: Tales of Monkey Island 3 (WiiWare), Zombies Ate My Neighbors (SNES, Virtual Console)

Top scoring Wii review: Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers and Pro Evolution Soccer 2010, tied at 8.0 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks, 9.5
Lowest rated Wii review: Jambo! Safari, 3.5
Lowest rated DS review: Avatar: The Game, 5.0

O RLY? – Despite Nintendo Power’s big puff piece on the Wii version of Avatar: The Game back in October, the final review received a tepid 5.0. The final sentiment: “yet another middling licensed game.”

Blowing the Crystal curve. – Note that NP’s 8.0 for Crystal Bearers is way out of line with other reviews. According to the mag, the graphics are great, there’s a ton of optional sidequests/minigames, and the telekinesis hook “works like a charm.”

It really IS big! – NP has a life-size image of the upcoming DSi XL, and it’s almost as big as the entire magazine page. Just remember, kids, a bigger screen means crap if it doesn’t come with a better resolution.

Another go at Blue Dragon. – Blue Dragon Plus was lousy. The next DS installment in the franchise, Blue Dragon: Awakened Shadows will ditch the SRPG style for an action RPG where you get to create your own character.

Mega Man 9 could have been a ReBirth. – Mega Man creator Keiji Inafune reveals that Mega Man 9 could have had two graphics options, one the pure NES vision but also a choice for a more modern redesign.

Another long-running Japanese franchise is readying a Western debut. – Nintendo has opened the doors an another only-in-Japan series (remember when we finally got our first Advance Wars?), and it’s Glory of Heracles for DS. As “new” first-party IP, expect Heracles to get a lot of talk in the new year.

It’s time to vote in the 2009 Nintendo Power awards! – Head to the online entry form and vote in over 20 categories of the Year in Nintendo. Maybe you can be the one that gets Dead Space Extraction that Best Story win!

Next month in Nintendo Power… issue #251 promises a look ahead at 2010, including Metroid: Other M, Mario Galaxy 2, Monster Hunter Tri, and the new Pokemon Gold/Silver.

The main focus of this Game Informer is hitting issue 200, a major milestone for any magazine.  Looking back at their bicentennial, Game Informer has all the editors chipping in to select the top 200 games of all time.  Some of the selections are obvious, like Doom and a few Zeldas, but there are a few surprises, like Beyond Good and Evil sneaking in, and Okami making an appearance at #83.  Who makes number one.  Well I can say that I have routinely made fun of the series on several occasions on the podcast, so see what you can guess from that clue.

Along with the 200 games, we also have a huge selection of quotables that can be good or bad depending on who you were.  Some of the great ones include the following:

“What Xbox needs is a slew of high-profile games that console gamers will die for, since I don’t think Dead or Alive 3 or Halo (those amazing titles) will be enough” – Andy, Letter from the Editor, September 2001

“It seems likely that Enter the Matrix will eclipse the success of the motion picture universe it extends from.” – Enter the Matrix cover story, December 2002

“We don’t expect Activision to nickel and dime you for new levels and clothing [in Tony Hawk]” – Microsoft’s J. Allard, September 2002

“I got to see and touch the PSP – I want to rub my balls on it.” – Epic Games Cliff Bleszinski, July 2004

Also, included in the quotes are some of the great quips from some of the worst reviewed games in the 200 issues of Game Informer.  I thought about putting some in here, but they are too good to be spoiled.  There are also a ton of statistics on the breakdowns of the covers from all 200 issues.  Just know that Activision is the most featured publisher, while a solo female on the cover only happened 1.7% of the issues.

Features:

Return of the VGA’s – Bryan Vore takes a look at the evolution of the Spike Video Game Awards, and how they went from being a sham of an awards ceremony, to where they are today.  It was interesting to see how Spike has tried to integrate itself into the gaming community, by creating feature programming like GameTrailers TV and more.  Dollhouse fans will note that there is a nice picture of Eliza Dushku in the article.

Top Ten Games That Almost Were - This months top ten list looks at games that looked like they would be great hits, only to die a quiet death in development hell.  Some of the titles in the list include Thrill Kill, Starcraft: Ghost and Star Fox 2.

Impulse – As always, we get a look at some of the smaller, independent developers that have titles hitting download services, or store shelves.  This month, choices include Joe Danger and Excitebike: World Rally.

Massive – With the release of Aion, the Massive column looks at the ups, downs and uglies that people will find with NCSoft’s new release.  Written by Adam Biessner

All Ages – Foul language plays into this month’s article, where Jeff Cork talks about some of the recent titles that add features to make a violent game a little more playable when it comes to youngsters.  Some titles featured are Brutal Legend and Gears of War 2.

Afterwords – Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 graces this feature, with Vicarious Visions president and co-founder, Guha Bala answering the questions from the Game Informer staff.  They ask about the lack of more alternate costumes, the deviation from the Civil War comic series and more.

Also, there is a feature on Christmas shopping for certain kinds of geeks, with each featuring several items.  My personal favorite was the Sci-fi one that had the Taunton Sleeping back, complete with lightsaber zipper.

Interviews:

Pennn Jillette talks about his recent show that dealt with the controversy surrounding video games.  They also talk about the charity event that is centered around playing their gaming title, Desert Bus.

Danny Bilson is interviewed as he enters his new position and director of core developement at THQ.  Of note is the several mentions of Saints Row 3 development and how well it is going.  Also, is some joking about the is it/is it not in development surrounding a Red Faction sequel.

Previews (highlights):

Bioshock 2 – Talks about the game moving to a period in the early 1970’s.  Also mentions that your character from the first title, Jack, would not survive the Rapture that is seen in the sequel.  – by Annette Gonzales

The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks – Features several screenshots from the game, as well as a description of the setup for the title.  – by Dan Ryckert

Gran Turismo 5 – The long awaited title gets a two page preview, with a lot of screenshots.  The talk about the signing of the NASCAR and World Rally Championship, as well as the damage implementation.  Of note is the inclusion of electric vehicles in the title.  Prius + Nuremburg = weird. – by Nick Ahrens

Reviews (highlights):

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 -  9.75 (PS3, 360)
Borderlands – 9.25 (PS3, 360)
Dragon Age: Origins – 8 (PS3, 360)
Lego Indiana Jones 2: The Adventure Continues  – 6.5 (PS3, 360, Wii, PC)

Overall, the review scores were fairly high, but this may have something to do with the number of A Level titles that were reviewed this month.

There you have it, my first attempt at a Read-a-long.  If you like the magazine this month, make sure to head over to www.gameinformer.com and pick up a subscription or of course, you can get it free by entering a Gamestop and signing up for a discount card.  Either way, it was a rather entertaining issue.  I just wish I had the ability to get all of the covers that were used for this issue, as there is a Doom varient, along with two others.

Let me know in the comments what you like and dislike.  And yes, the column will get more refined as I get comfortable with a layout.

Issue #249, Holiday 2009
featuring The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks (DS), Monster Hunter Tri (Wii)

All I need to hear about Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks is that they did away with that horrible repeating temple crap that ruined Phantom Hourglass.

They did.

Set 100 years after Phantom Hourglass, Spirit Tracks recently hit the big time by revealing the game’s key spirit: Zelda herself. Her body kidnapped and her soul left as a ghost only Link can see, Zelda is the cutest in-game item since the Tingle Tuner. You’ll use her intangible form to possess guardians, leading to the usual weapon-beats-puzzle adventure dynamic. She’s afraid of mice, however, so I imagine bombchus are right out.

The train theme seems to promise a fairly quirky Zelda riff. This Link begins the game as a humble engineer (is this the first Link to have a genuine career path at the outset?), and those train tracks are actually ley lines that have been set up to hold back some terrible evil force. Naturally, some idiot wants to release the beast, so Link and Ghost Zelda (Soulda?) must ride the rails and save the day.

Now if I can hear that Spirit Tracks offers the kind of sidequests and non-linear exploration that I prefer in my Zelda games, I’ll be fully prepared to let it redeem the sour taste left by Hourglass. The release date is December 7th.

Please back away from your monitor and look at this image from No More Heroes: Desperate Struggle.

Knowing the No More Heroes franchise (yay! it’s a franchise now!), I’m sure that pose is entirely intended. What’s funny is that Nintendo Power chose to print it.

Game Informer may have had the exclusive reveal, but NP also talked with Warren Spector RE: Epic Mickey. The screenshots and production art are the same images we’ve already seen (including creepy robo-Donald!), but Spector jauntily summarizes the game’s key points. Kicking things off by suggesting Mickey needs a return visit to his early, anarchistic cartoons… which, honestly, is a topic that comes around every couple of years. The last time this happened, we got the forgettable cartoon “Runaway Brain.”

The article does not talk a bit about the control scheme, but it does cover some broad takes on the game’s use of paint thinner. Mickey is able to erase parts of the environment to screw with enemies, or he can just erase the baddies entirely. Knowing that you’re likely already thinking “Nice, I’ll just erase everything and walk through a giant blank canvas to the credit roll,” Spector points out that the as-yet-revealed simplistic paint thinner examples are not all there is to it.

For the Disney geek like me, the most fun part of Epic Mickey is the promise that the game is dipping into the untouched corners of Walt’s catalog. Much internet hay has been made about the usage of Oswald the Lucky Rabbit… positioned as a guy who was destined for greatness but then usurped by Mickey’s popularity. However, Spector says Oswald is not the villain. Mickey must redeem Oswald over the course of the game, suggesting that perhaps Oswald returns to the side of good. Which sounds to me like one of those Dragon Ball plot twists… when suddenly Vegeta is wearing a pink shirt and filling the role of Earth’s Grumpiest Z-Warrior.

Other sources have mentioned the Phantom Blot as another obscure Disney ref in the game. How about including Ranger Woodlore and those stupid ugly bears? Ferdinand the Bull? Lambert the Sheepish Lion? Can we finally find out who is Molly Cunningham’s father?

If anybody wants to know what the guy who brought us Wing Commander, Thief and System Shock is doing working on a Mickey Mouse game, I should point out that Spector was a key developer of the 1980’s paper-and-dice role-playing game Toon. Which was pretty much a love letter to the violently madcap cartoons of the 1930s through the 1950s.

NP lists Epic Mickey’s release as Fall 2010. Spector’s dream project Deus Os: The Lucky Rabbit War will follow in 2012.

Let’s get behind games that combine lame internet memes with public domain IP. Games like Zombie Panic in Wonderland, coming to WiiWare by the end of the year. It’s a two-player shooter using the Remote+Nunchuk configuration, starring anime versions of Snow White and Dorothy (of Oz). It’s from the same people who brought Little Red Riding Hood’s Zombie BBQ to the Nintendo DS last year (and to DSiWare shortly).

While I can’t see a zombie without rolling my eyes, I do dig the game’s global selection of playable mythic characters… Snow White represents Europe, the Oz books are an American invention, and Momotaro (the peach boy) comes from Japan. I also dig anime Dorothy:

I’m currently re-reading the century-old Oz books, and this kind of wanton violence isn’t as far off as Judy Garland may have led you to believe.

According to Nintendo Power, the five most important DS games are:

• Nintendogs
• Trauma Center: Under the Knife
• Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow
• Mario Kart DS
• Dragon Quest IX

Four of those came out in 2005. The line graph really doesn’t speak too well for the system’s growth. Let’s make this list a top ten and include Brain Age (2006), Elite Beat Agents (2006), Cooking Mama (2006), Professor Layton (2008) and Scribblenauts (2009).

Rationale: Brain Age led (and won) the charge for new categories of gamers. EBA demonstrated that stylus controls can be fast and hip. Cooking Mama showed that even $20 budget titles could become franchises when done right. Professor Layton brought cinematic flair to the casual brainteaser. And Scribblenauts proved that a five year old handheld can still make some serious waves, even as the industry marches into the bold HD future.

Download Staff Picks: LostWinds: Winter of the Melodias (WiiWare), Pokemon Rumble (WiiWare), Excitebike: World Rally (WiiWare), Dragon Quest Wars (DSiWare)

Top scoring Wii review: New Super Mario Bros Wii and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare; Reflex, tied at 9.0 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Bookworm DS, 8.5
Lowest rated Wii review: Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Republic Heroes, 5.0
Lowest rated DS review: C.O.P.: The Recruit, 4.0

Other notable review scores this issue… Silent Hill: Shattered Memories (Wii) and Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles (Wii) both scared up an 8.0, as did LEGO Rock Band (Wii). Rabbids Go Home rated 7.0 for both the Wii and DS versions. Naruto Shippuden 3: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 (Wii) was ranked 7.5. Need for Speed Nitro (Wii) hit 7.0. DJ Hero (Wii) almost cracked the top with an 8.5.

There goes that theory. – I’ve been speculating for months that New Super Mario Bros Wii would include Peach as an unlockable playable character, but Shigeru Miyamoto himself says no. The reason: they would have had to model her dress.

Vampires trump zombies for pop culture supremacy! – “Almost everybody loves vampires these days,” begins NP’s look at Castlevania: The Adventure ReBirth. NP has spoken. Zombies are dead. Er.

Gotta code ‘em all! – Complete your Pokemon Rumble pokedex with this password for a morbidly powerful Venusaur: 1589-3955. You can use him right away, but his power level will be capped according to the last Battle Royale zone you have defeated. As you work up the zones, his power will increase to the next cap. Nice!

This issue’s fap material: – The character sketches of Risky Boots, the sexy pirate villain of DSiWare’s Shantae: Risky’s Revenge. Enjoy.

Are you freaking kidding me. – The natural resource that triggers the man vs nature plot of James Cameron’s Avatar is called “unobtanium.” I’m going with “uncreativum” and definitely “uninterestium.”

Better bundle. Better price. – Papa John’s pizza is currently teaming with Best Buy for a deal on Wii Sports Resort. Buy two Cokes and you’ll get a $10 coupon for Wii Sports Resort… but only if you also buy a second Wii MotionPlus. So that amounts to $60, which is the regular price of the Resort double-bundle that comes with two MotionPlus accessories. As that bundle is supposedly a limited edition, maybe this Papa John’s/Best Buy is your next available option.

Next month in Nintendo Power… issue #250. Expect a celebration.

Issue #248, December 2009
featuring New Super Mario Bros Wii, Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing (Wii), Infinite Space (DS)

Nintendo announced a flurry of new games at E3 09, but only one was slotted to be this year’s big holiday title… and that’s New Super Mario Bros Wii. Nintendo Power is quick to point out the game is no watered down party minigame collection. In fact, it’s more of a watered-up version of New Super Mario Bros on DS.

As the first console-based 2D Mario title in eighteen years, NSMBW owes everything to the NES/SNES generation. The screenshots show rolling hills, card-matching minigames, an overworld map, and the usual allotment of tubes, coins and blocks. NP stresses that the game is a fully capable single-player experience, just in case you thought the levels were best enjoyed with the 4-man multiplayer.

For those of you coming into the game from the like-minded DS game, note that NSMBW lets you keep a much larger pile of collected items like fire flowers and whatnot. However, you can no longer activate a stored item in the middle of the level; you have to use it on the map screen before a level begins.

Some nitty-gritty items: NSMBW supports both Remote alone and Remote+Nunchuk control schemes. The game seems to have inherited the tilting Remote mechanic used in Warioland: Shake It. This is the first 2D Mario game in widescreen, but NP doesn’t say what happens to those of you with old, crappy 4:3 TVs. Does it center-cut the image, or do you have to play it letterboxed? Just like in Smash Bros Brawl, the camera will zoom in and out depending on how tight the players are in the level.

The Koopa Kids return from the dead to play bosses in New Super Mario Bros Wii. All ugly seven of them. With their dorky American Instruction Manual 1990 celebrity names. There’s a good reason Nintendo has done very little with this team of sops in nearly twenty years. Bowser Jr is also in NSMBW and hopefully he kicks the Koopalings around.

Nintendo is still holding on to the previously revealed playable lineup of Mario, Luigi, Toad and Toad. And no, neither of the Toads are clad in the traditional red so the game can preserve easily identifiable colors for all the players. Mario and Luigi own red and green, so the Toads must come in blue and yellow flavors. I still say Nintendo is holding Playable Peach as a hidden ace, because how can a fan-service title like this ignore the Super Mario Bros 2 cast of Mario, Luigi, Toad and Peach? We’ll see if I’m right when the game is released next week.

Have you checked out Nintendo Week? This weekly miniature TV show starting showing up on the Wii’s Nintendo Channel in September. Clean-cut hosts Gary and Alison spend each episode going over the newest releases from all over Nintendo: Wii, DS, Virtual Console, etc.

Nintendo Power introduces the duo in this issue with a brief interview. Unfortunately, it’s not a stellar showing, as the mag basically asks the same question three times, resulting in the hosts having to say the same thing (“I’m a big [Nintendo] fan!”) three times. We do learn that Gary is currently deep into Scribblenauts and Professor Layton, while Alison likes Wii Sports and Donkey Kong Country.

I’ve caught a few of their shows and they are moderately watchable. They are far too scripted and overwritten for adult tastes (they have an odd predilection for calling the DS “the Nintendo DS System”), but kids should enjoy it. They remind me of the first wave of dopey video game shows that landed on TV when I was a kid during the NES era. Of course, I think that supposedly mature shows like X-Play are far too scripted and overwritten as well. But at least with Nintendo Week you know you’re not going to get clumsy sex jokes before each commercial break.

Nintendo might actually try to leverage Nintendo Week once in a while. The episode for the week of October 26 contained the exclusive reveal of the new WiiWare title Excitebike: World Tour.

NP’s Ultimate Zelda list manages to rank thirteen Zelda games, as well as award categories like Best Weapon and Best Overworld. Here’s their order:

• #13. Zelda II (NES, 1988)
• #12 Four Swords Adventures (GameCube, 2004)
• #11 Majora’s Mask (N64, 2000)
• #10/9 Oracle of Ages/Seasons (Game Boy, 2001)
• #8 Minish Cap (GBA, 2004)
• #7 Phantom Hourglass (DS, 2007)
• #6 Wind Waker (GameCube, 2003)
• #5 Link’s Awakening (Game Boy, 1993)
• #4 Twilight Princess (Wii, 2006)
• #3 Legend of Zelda (NES, 1987)
• #2 A Link to the Past (SNES, 1992)
• #1 Ocarina of Time (N64, 1998)

Having played only eight of those, I’m hardly in a position to rank… but I’d put Wind Waker as number one.

These (NO NAME GIVEN) credits have got to stop.

I don’t know where or how Nintendo Power solicits some of their reader mail. Every issue devotes a page to multiple readers’ responses to one specific question. This issue, it’s “Which game world do you find the most compelling?” They must collect responses through a poorly-defined form on their website, because more and more NP seems obliged to publish quotes from people who do not leave their names. Not even their fakey internet names. Which leads to not-entirely-convincing missives like this one:

I suppose it is entirely possible that one fan thinks Wuhu Island from Wii Sports Resort satisfies some mad definition of the word “compelling.” But signing it with a (NO NAME GIVEN) makes me think the writer was ashamed of his pick. Just seems to unintentionally undermine the whole thing.

Download Staff Picks: Contra Rebirth (WiiWare), Tales of Monkey Island 2 (WiiWare), Phantasy Star (Sega Master System), Puzzle League Express (DSiWare)

Top scoring Wii review: Three Wii games at 7.5 this month… WWE Smackdown vs Raw 2010, Astro Boy: The Video Game, and Harvest Moon: Animal Parade. (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: An unbelievable six DS games ranked 8.0… Phantasy Star 0, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Sky, Atelier Annie: Alchemists of Sera Island, Dragon Ball Z: Attack of the Saiyans, Drawn to Life: The Next Chapter, and Space Invaders Extreme 2. No more complaining about low-quality DS games, okay?
Lowest rated Wii review: SimAnimals Africa, 5.0
Lowest rated DS review: Fighting Fantasy: The Warlock of Firetop Mountain, 4.0

Other notable review scores this issue include DDR: Hottest Party 3 (Wii, 6.5), Nostalgia (DS, 7.0), Academy of Champions: Soccer (Wii, 6.5), Cooking Mama 3 (DS, 6.0), TMNT: Arcade Attack (DS, 4.5) and Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 (Wii, 5.5).

Frank busts a move. – You may have heard that the US release of Wii-exclusive Tatsunoko vs Capcom: Ultimate All-Stars will feature Frank West of Dead Rising, but did you know that he can wear a Mega Buster-toting Mega Man outfit in the game?

Follow the money. – Infinite Space became a DS game because director Hifumi Kouno thought his budget was not large enough for a console release. Reasonable fellow, that Hifumi.

Don’t forget your Arceus! – Polish off your legitimately collected Pokedex in Pokemon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum with a visit to Toys R Us during the week of November 7 to 15. You’ll be downloading the last pokemon of this generation, Arceus.

The DSi-specific carts are coming. – Foto Fighter, one of a half-dozen games that I have seen claim to be “the first game made specifically for the Nintendo DSi,” lets you take pictures of household objects to spawn battling monsters. Sounds cooler than it actually is… NP makes it sound like the game is only really looking for basic shapes and colors in your pictures, and the resultant poke-ripoffs look nothing like your source photo.

And this isn’t even Sonic’s first racing game. – Sonic may have been a Brawler and an Olympic champion, but he’s not joining every Mario family game just yet. Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing will feature over twenty Sega characters in their own kart racer.

But he wanted to be an interior designer. – Composer Akira Yamaoka went from the music director for the first Silent Hillto the franchise’s producer for Silent Hill 3 and 4. For the upcoming Silent Hill: Shattered Memories, he’s back to being just the composer.

Next month in Nintendo Power… with the big first-party Wii game out of the way, NP turns to the season’s big DS game, Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks. Plus, celebrate as the DS turns five!

Issue #247, November 2009
featuring Shantae: Risky’s Revenge (DSiWare), Resident Evil: Darkside Chronicles (Wii), Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Sky (DS), C.O.P.: The Recruit (DS)

Let’s jump right to the reviews since there’s so many key titles to discuss. I’ll take it from the top.

First up is Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days. NP gives it a 9.0 and suggests that it may be Square Enix’s finest achievement on the DS. Although the review reserves an entire page, it really doesn’t say much about the game other than it’s good. The DS game is very similar to the originals in gameplay, but is slow to start and recycles the PS2 soundtracks again.

Kingdom Hearts shares 9.0 top honors with Scribblenauts. The review points out the game’s critical flaws but is far more generous than I am. NP doesn’t bring up the awful controls, but they do point out the stupid snapback camera and the mysterious deaths brought about by confusing win/loss parameters. That doesn’t add up to a 9.0 game in my book.

Speaking of that, the top Wii game of the issue is Beatles: Rock Band with a 9.0. I continue to be mystified by how critics everywhere agreed to review this game in a vacuum where other similar games do not exist. Did the Rock Band 2 instruments on Wii not include auto-calibration? Because Nintendo Power spends fully one quarter of the review lauding the Beatles edition instruments for having that feature, as if that’s a huge selling point.

Coming in at 8.5 is A Boy and His Blob for Wii, which is described as beautiful, refreshing, challenging and sophisticated. And they don’t even mention the hug button!

Anybody anticipating Might & Magic: Clash of Heroes on DS? No? You may want to re-think that, as it also scored an 8.5. It’s a puzzle-RPG mash-up similar to cult hit Puzzle Quest.

There’s three games at 8.0: Guitar Hero 5 (“noticeably improved from Guitar Hero World Tour“), Dead Space Extraction (“pretty darn satisfying”), and the DS version of Mario & Sonic at the Winter Olympic Games (“many of the games are enjoyable.”)

Clicking down to 7.5 we find three Wii titles: Mini Ninjas, Spyborgs, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Smash-Up. The latter “pales in comparison” to Super Smash Bros Brawl, by the way. Some games, apparently, we’re allowed to review based on how they compare to similar titles.

7.0 brings us the Wii edition of Mario & Sonic Winter Olympics, Hero’s Saga: Laevatein Tactics on DS, Naruto Shippuden: Ninja Destiny 2 (also DS), as well as Spore Hero and MySims Agents, both for Wii.

That’s sixteen well-reviewed Wii/DS games, and hopefully some fine recommendations for the Nintendo fan on your shopping list.

Shantae is back! Shantae has always been the very definition of cult classic for me. The original Game Boy Color game was released in June 2002, which was, you know, a full year after the Game Boy Advance came out. Naturally, even the best reviews couldn’t push a GBC game and it flamed out… but not before developing a rabid fanbase. Creator Matt Bozon notes that Nintendo Power rated it 9.0, the same month they gave a 9.0 to Super Mario Sunshine.

Developer WayForward kept up their love for the character with an unfinished GBA sequel, not to mention Shantae tech demos on just about every system from the GameCube to the PSP. And now WayForward is proud to reveal that the belly-dancing nymph is officially returning in a trilogy of episodic DSiWare games.

Shantae is cute as hell. The first installment, Shantae: Risky’s Revenge, is on the docket for a late 2009 release. The line will follow in the footsteps of classic 2D platformers, but Bozon promises that it will avoid the frustrating design pitfalls of the genre… like, for example, pitfalls.

Last issue, we were introduced to Tower of Shadow, now meet NightSky. Is there some kind of secret Let’s Make Dark Wii Games cabal?

Headed to WiiWare, NightSky asks you to help a ball roll across the level by manipulating the environment. Sounds like a LocoRoco riff, but these screens underline the difference.

The game uses shadow silhouettes over a twilit background to great effect. Looks like another experimental title to keep an eye on!

What is up with the stock photo of the Resident Evil zombie head t-shirt?

You’ve seen this a dozen times by now.

I get that the Capcom press corps probably didn’t want to release an image of a guy lifting his zombie shirt to reveal his doughy gamer’s belly, but isn’t that faked-up image a little weird?

You can expose your own untanned stomach in one of these cool shirts by pre-ordering Resident Evil: Darkside Chronicles through GameStop.

I have codified the difference between Japanese and American game developers. When you read interviews with Japanese game developers (like this issue’s turn with Level-5’s Akihiro Hino), do you find yourself struck with how humble they tend to sound? Almost every Nintendo Power interview with a Japanese dev can be trusted to end with a “please enjoy my game!” Meanwhile, whenever the press talks with David Jaffe, you’re lucky to get anything useful aside from f-bombs and complaints about upper management. Here’s how I see it:

And that’s the difference between Eastern and Western game developers.

Download Staff Picks: NyxQuest: Kindred Spirits (WiiWare), Revene of Shinobi (Sega Genesis), Super Star Wars (Super NES), Art Style: Precipice (DSiWare)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Errata – Last issue, NP said Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Arcade Attack was a Wii game. It’s actually a DS release.

We’ve never played a real one – Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey is on its way to DS, and Atlus is dubbing it the first “true” Shin Megami Tensei game in quite some time. Devil Survivor and the Persona series are just spin-offs!

You didn’t expect this when you bashed the DSi! – Guitar simulator sequel Jam Sessions 2 will use the DSi camera as a wah-wah pedal. No explanation is offered.

That’s one big DS cart – The largest Nintendo DS game yet produced will be Ninokuni: The Another World, a joing venture between Level-5 and Studio Ghibli. The 4-gigibit size seems to be mainly used for the game’s soundtrack.

Nothing is safe from the the modern reinventionists! – Coming soon to WiiWare: Bonk: Brink of Extinction. You know, I lived through the 16-bit era, and I can’t summon up one worthy memory of Bonk.

The all-audiences GTA – C.O.P.: The Recruit is trying to take the 3D world of a PSP GTA game and marry it to the DS-specifics of the DS GTA game. And with a T rating, it may gain some ground as a gateway title for kids on their way to the bigger boys.

Super Mario Postman! – Reader CPL1701 wrote in to laugh about a supposed secret “MARIO” word on his address label… but he figured out that he was just misreading the “MAR10″ that indicates his subscription expires in March of next year.

Next month in Nintendo Power… It’s here, Nintendo’s biggest title of the season (and probably the year): New Super Mario Bros Wii.

Issue #246, October 2009
featuring Avatar (Wii), Tower of Shadow (Wii), Sakura Wars: So Long, My Love (Wii), Dementium II (DS), WWE Smackdown vs Raw (Wii/DS)

This could be a terribly damning statement: “Hollywood’s most notorious perfectionist isn’t about to have his work tarnished by a crappy video game.” As James Cameron’s first movie since Titanic, anticipation is high for Avatar, even if animation wags have already ginned up some unfavorable similarities to box office turd Delgo. You can go enjoy that link, by the way. It’s really funny.

So what about the game? The Wii version will be entirely different from the PS3/360 edition, and none of them will simply follow along with the film’s story as with most movie-to-game adaptations. On the Wii, we’ll get a prequel. And a frankly bizarre assortment of Nintendo peripheral usage.

You’ll flick the Remote to initiate stealth attacks, and swing it to bash around your staff. But that’s fairly normal stuff for a Wii action game, and we can take small comfort in creative director Daniel Bisson’s promise that “Too many [Wii games] ask you to waggle all the time. We wanted to prevent that as much as possible.”

How about MotionPlus support? Yep, it’s on the docket in the form of the Hellfire Wasp. If you have the MotionPlus plug-in, you’ll be able to fly the bug around the level to assist with platforming puzzles. If you don’t have a MotionPlus, there will always be another way to solve the level. Sort of reminds me of the Tingle Tuner from Wind Waker.

And let’s not forget the Balance Board. There are on-rails flying sections that can be controlled by, I assume, leaning.

I have to say, this all seems very average to me. In fact, the reliance on Wii gimmickry raises substantial cause for concern. I don’t get any feeling that this will be any more than a regular ol’ mediocre movie game. Similar to how I don’t see Avatar being more than a regular ol’ mediocre animated fantasy adventure flick. Maybe I’m wrong. But this article certainly doesn’t offer much to change my mind. I’ll go check out Delgo for a preview.

Whatever. Let’s move on to something that legitimately looks awesome: Tower of Shadow. It’s still a long way off (summer 2010), but Hudson’s Wii exclusive looks like this generation’s Ico. The similarity begins with the bloomed-out lighting and subdued color palette, but the game also exudes that thoughtful poignancy that marked Ico and Shadow of the Colossus.

We’ve seen a lot of unique takes on 2D games lately, from Warioland: Shake It to Braid, and Muramasa to the forthcoming A Boy and His Blob. Tower of Shadow’s deal is that the 3D environment creates a 2D platforming world by way of realistically projected shadows.

As the unnamed shadow boy, you’ll exist only in a flat plane, traversing a level that is created as shadows lie across the 3D world. Designer Osamu Tsuchihashi promises that there will be ways to interact with the physical realm to adjust or manipulate the shadows. Tsuchihashi won’t say much about the game’s story… other than that there’s a tower and a boy in it. But when NP drops the word “melancholy” to describe it, one look at those screenshots is enough to convince me they’re on the right track.

A lot can happen between now and next summer, but this is definitely one to watch on Wii.

This reader letter has GOT to be fake.

Am I the only one wishing for a new Mach Rider game? It begs for Wii Wheel support, and when the rider loses a life, it would be cool to see him blow up and come back together with 3-D graphics!

Mach Rider was an NES launch game. So here we have a probable adult (can you imagine a kid picking up Mach Rider on the Virtual Console?) trying to talk up a new version of an ancient, unloved game by suggesting it utilize the friggin’ Wii Wheel, big explosions, and the phrase “3-D graphics.” I call shenanigans.

Last issue, readers submitted “ideas” for Wii MotionPlus uses. This time, it’s all about the Vitality Sensor. The most popular suggestion is that games could sense your stress level and adjust the difficulty accordingly. Which is probably the best idea since we killed off all the passenger pigeons.

Whether the game gets harder because you’re calm, or easier because you’re stressed, this doesn’t strike me as a particularly accurate use of the tech. I don’t think you can assume that the player is ever 100% focused on the game, and therefore any assumptions based on heart rate or whatever are out the window. What if you’re playing a game to relax and you end up involved in a verbal argument with someone in another room… that stress has nothing to do with the game.

And has anybody considered that the damn Vitality Sensor seems to take one entire hand out of action? It plugs into the Nunchuk port, and it probably requires your left hand to lie still on a flat surface. This trinket is destined for non-games only, gang. These attempts to jam it into a “core” game experience are amusing thought experiments at best, and the ravings of blinded fanboys at worst.

Download Staff Picks: Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life as a Darklord (WiiWare), Bit.Trip Core (WiiWare), Tales of Monkey Island Chapter 1 (WiiWare), Pulseman (Sega Genesis)

Top scoring Wii review: Muramasa: The Demon Blade and NHL 2K10, tied at 8.0 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Mario & Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story 9.5
Lowest rated Wii review: Valhalla Knights: Eldar Saga, 4.0
Lowest rated DS review: IL-2 Sturmovik: Birds of Prey and Bleach: The 3rd Phantom, tied at 4.0

This issue also sees two first-party DS games – Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box and Fossil Fighters – reviewed at 8.0. Cursed Mountain for Wii hit 7.0, but the Wii version of Disney’s stab at Pokemon, Spectrobes: Origins, mustered a mere 5.5.

The Club bonus that could have been. – Before they settled on Doc Louis’ Punch-Out!! as the surprise reward for Club Nintendo Platinum members, Nintendo was considering putting Doc Louis in “an 8-bit bicycle race with upbeat chip-tune music.” Now join me in saying awwwwwwwwww.

Advice from the Guru of Greatness – WWE sports entertainer John Morrison has some advice for your least favorite Smash Bros stars. He says Pit should wear pants, Captain Falcon should smile more, and Luigi should consider “some biometric upper-body work.”

Yeah, you don’t remember him – Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Smash-Up gets points on the board for including little known B-character Fugitoid… but loses BIG points for using the hideous 90s animated series TMNT logo on the box art.

Hot on the heels of Smash-Up – There’s another Ninja Turtles game on the way to Wii, and the subtitle Arcade Attack should tell you all you need to know. The game will feature storyline panels from the original black-and-white Eastman & Laird comic book.

Curious about Sega’s Sakura Wars? – Sakura Wars is a real deal in Japan, with the franchise cresting dozens of core games and spin-off titles… but its western debut comes in the form of a Wii port of the PS2’s Sakura Wars: So Long, My Love this November. It’s an adventure game (like, with dialogue trees and everything!) about steam-powered mechs and young opera singers.

Dementium, spoiled – NP doesn’t mind wrecking the ending of the original Dementium game, Bobby Ewing-style. The sequel, coming to DS early next year, will feature a better save system.

Next month in Nintendo Power… after apologizing for no No More Heroes, NP vows a Halloween-timed focus on Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles. Also, NP will reveal a “major DSiWare title.” Woot!

Issue #245, September 2009
featuring Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers (Wii), Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box (DS), Super Monkey Ball: Step & Roll (Wii), The Beatles: Rock Band (Wii), Dead Space Extraction (Wii)

Hard to believe that Crystal Bearers will be the sixth Crystal Chronicles title. It doesn’t seem like it’s been that long since we tried gathering four GBAs for an evening of connectivity cable madness on the first game in the series. Crystal Bearers has been up and down since 2006, and now Nintendo Power has it pegged for release by the end of this year. NP calls it “one of the most exciting Final Fantasy games in ages” and that it has a “dynamic new logo.” Seriously. They called out the logo.

FFCC:tCB takes places one thousand years after the GameCube original, which is one of those KOTOR-like timelines that always give me fits. You live in the year 2009. Go try and interact with someone from the year 1009. Now explain to me why these games always exist in a thousand-year evolutionary freeze frame, where basic technologies never advance and everybody still speaks the same language.

Now, Crystal Bearers has given the world of Crystal Chronicles some changes in those thousand years. The Lilties are now the top dog (they were the little tanks from the first game) and they seem to have gotten taller. They’re sort of Goron-esque now, which is not a compliment. The Lilties have killed off all the Yukes (the ugly stork people), so the game’s first thrust of plot comes as a lone Yuke re-appears in the world. Probably hell-bent on revenge.

The gameplay hook revolves around lead character Layle being telekinetic. Using the Remote as a pointer, you can pick up items (and people) in the gameworld and toss them around. Layle is actually largely free of weapons, since he can pick up pretty anything and throw it. The telekinetic controls are used for exploration and in combat. NP also suggests the game has no RPG elements that you would expect of a Final Fantasy game. No spells, no inventory, and only a minimum of equipment slots. The development team is aiming for a solid action-adventure title with the depth and backstory of a RPG.

Motion controls are also used in light gun sequences and to pilot an airship. Itahana name-checks snowboarding, dancing and farming as additional waggle-action. It seems sort of minigamish to me, but I would expect that the traditionally heavy Final Fantasy story and free-roaming exploration will add much gravitas to all the shooting gallery dancing harvesttime snowboarding bits. FFCC:tCB does not use Wii MotionPlus, because the game does “not require heightened sensitivity.”

Is there a reason why Nintendo Power can’t name Peter Griffin?

You know, back when The Simpsons, Beavis & Butt-head, and Ren & Stimpy were the Moral Majority’s favorite animated targets, Nintendo Power had no trouble naming those shows.

What is with you fanboys and Wii MotionPlus? You’re worse than 360 kids and Natal. In this issue’s letter column, there is a raft of solicited ideas about how MotionPlus could be used to make gaming better. Look, I bought the damn thing, and I am ALL FOR new stupid control accessories (I’m still pissed that Nintendo bailed on the eReader and allowed Sony to debut a camera-assisted trading card game. Hello, Pokemon TCG?!?!) but the supposed “ideas” are the same silly crap that we all heard back in mid-2006. Here’s some gems for you:

• - 1:1 swordfighting in Zelda!!!!111!!
• - Tail swinging in Godzilla!!!111!!
• - Fight using a staff!!111111111
• - LIGHTSABER OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!
• - Warioland: Shake It would be more accurate!!!!!11111!!!!

Come the f on. You mean to tell me that NOW, all of a sudden, we’re all so terribly disappointed in how the Wii Remote has worked for the last three years? One reader says that WarioWare: Smooth Moves did not follow movements well enough. Another says that MotionPlus would bring better bow-and-arrow aiming to Twilight Princess. A third wants MotionPlus sword slashing in Sin and Punishment 2.

Here’s the news, gang: These games are not magically bad now that MotionPlus exists. NOBODY was complaining about the archery controls in Twilight Princess or cursing inaccuracies in Warioland: Shake It. And who here thinks that the normal, unsexed Remote is functionally incapable of swinging a sword in S&P2? Go ahead and enjoy new games that leverage MotionPlus, but don’t jump on the bandwagon that somehow Nintendo’s launch day technology is now not up to snuff.

I wish somebody would go ahead and release that 1:1 swordfighting game that everybody thinks they want, so we can all find out how miserably tiring and un-fun that would be. As a community, we need to get past this.

These no doubt apply to all versions of The Beatles: Rock Band, but here’s some of the subtle changes Rock Band fans can expect from the Fab Four edition. The whammy bar will not change the guitar tone, and you will not be vamping any custom drum fills. Both of those features were removed to avoid screwing up the Beatles sound. Spoken parts no longer affect your score. And while harmonies will not hurt you if your singers can’t nail them, there will be a harmony trainer which will help you learn what George was doing. Since the Beatles did not record their vocals independently, Harmonix has put a flute into the trainer that will help you isolate each specific harmony track.

But at least one Beatles-breaking change had to made to appease the marketplace: Paul’s Hofner 500 bass replica is now right-handed. And it has a whammy bar. Hardware director Daniel Sussman claims the company “had a heated debate about these things for weeks.”

Download Staff Picks: Swords & Soldiers (WiiWare), Water Warfare (WiiWare), Space Harrier (Arcade), Mario vs Donkey Kong: Minis March Again (DSiWare)

Top scoring Wii review: Wii Sports Resort, 8.5 (all scores out of 10)
Top scoring DS review: Space Bust-a-Move and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, tied at 7.0
Lowest rated Wii review: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, 5.5
Lowest rated DS review: Ant Nation 2.0

A sign of the old Nintendo Power. – Here’s the kind of fanboy dorkishness that NP really doesn’t need. EIC Chris Slate claims to finally have been “bit by the Game Boy bug” while he helped on the mag’s Game Boy 20th anniversary article. Really. I suppose it’s better than the usual unnecessarily random GameCube slam.

From back before canon was king. – In November 1992, Super Star Wars arrived on the SNES allowing Luke Skywalker to lightsaber banthas and Han Solo to leap over TIE fighters. It is simultaneously odd and refreshing to think that, at one time, this decidedly non-canon game was about all the Star Wars product available. Lucas’s brand defense team would string you up if you suggested perverting the continuity like this today.

Random does not equal win – In a victory for those of us against giving your creative product a purposefully random or ironic name, WiiWare platformer Eduardo the Samurai Toaster was given a middle-of-the-road “Hmmm…” rating.

Oh, THAT’S why they didn’t review it. – Reader Pojo asked why NP never reviewed Wii Music, suggesting that they didn’t want to give it a low score and hurt holiday sales! NP bowed out of the discussion with the old chestnut that Wii Music isn’t a game per se. This must be a new editorial policy, because NP once gave Mario Paint a 3.9 out of 5.

Project Natal, scooped. – Ubisoft has a new fitness title coming (hooray!) that uses a USB camera to guide your exercising. Your Shape is due this very winter, ensuring that camera-assisted exercise games will be old news by the time Natal sees retail.

In those days, the pixels were larger. – The original Game Boy screen was 160 x 144 pixels. Today, your Instant Messenger buddy icon is probably bigger than that.

And you said it wasn’t a system-seller. – WWE champ Kofi Kingston just bought a Wii “two weeks ago” for Punch-Out. He claims to have run (like, jogged) to Best Buy to get it. He has never played Super Mario Sunshine, one of his favorite gaming characters is Solid Snake, and when he can’t play himself in a wrestling game, he picks the Undertaker.

Next month in Nintendo Power… “big upcoming games” like No More Heroes 2! Not much of a tease, I know.