Slide Adventure: Mag Kid is a Japan-only 2007 DS game, unique in that it comes packaged with a peripheral that adds a laser mouse to the bottom of your DS. The laser gadget – which also has a built-in rumble motor – lets you physically move the DS around a table, which is how you move your character in the game.

I recently imported Mag Kid just to see how it worked, as Nintendo seems to have no plans to shift this to other regions. Language barrier aside, it is a cute, peripheral-focused adventure game… although with some teeth-grinding time-wasting situated smack dab into the middle of every level.

But I’m not here to review Slide Adventure: Mag Kid, a title that even hardcore Nintendo fans have never heard of (unless your sharp mind recalls a few Mag Kid stickers hidden in Smash Brawl)… no, this is about some critical information scanned in from the instruction manual. Obviously the DS laser-mouse thingy, being a brand new piece of kit, needed to be packaged with some serious warnings detailing proper usage. Silly Japanese manual scans follow.

That’s basic. Don’t manhandle the thing. You’ll just get your screen(s) dirty.

Another good warning. It is a laser after all.

Sure, sure. You know, in Japan they call screwdrivers “plus” or “minus” depending on the shape of the head? Doesn’t that make more sense that the arbitrary “Phillips” brand name?

And don’t attempt to play Mag Kid while the DS is charging, or while you’re talking to it via the DS headset. Mag Kid values your silence.

Here’s something you may do with Mag Kid. Play it on a folding table.

But you WILL NOT play it on top of your priceless cutaway sculpture of the Sarlacc Pit!

And not on top of your cinder block!

And absolutely not on top of your baby grand piano! You’re supposed to be practicing for your recital, not scratching the veneer with your silly DS game!