Exclusive Interview, Blu-Ray Speaks!

By Richard Windsor | August 17, 2006

Recently I got to sit down and chat with a Blu-Ray disc. He wanted to do an interview in order to clear up all the nasty rumors surrounding him and his friends. Blu-Ray, or B-Ray as he asked me to call him wanted to let people know that he is the future, and that HD-DVD has waged a political mud slinging campaign in order to bring him and his father (Sony) down.

AEROPAUSE: Critics say that we don’t need you in order to enjoy our next generation games. What are your thoughts about that?

B-Ray: What I would say to my critics is 50GB baby! I have the capacity to last a long time and I am more then worth the price. I may be more expensive but I feel that I am worth it!

AEROPAUSE: People would point out that massive games such as Oblivion, which fits on a standard DVD would prove that you aren’t needed for next-gen games. Have you played Oblivion and do you think that you are necessary for games to advance?

B-Ray: The answer is yes! I was at a BBQ with my homeboy Hideo Kojima yesterday. He said that MGS4 would fit easily onto a DVD, but he wanted to put in about 40 hours of cut scenes. Kojima will need me in order to make that game successful. I see this happening a lot. Game designers will want long elaborate cut scenes in their games, because games are all about the cut scenes, and as far as Oblivion goes, I don’t care much for RPG’s.


AEROPAUSE: Your biggest critic is HD-DVD. Have the two of you talked? Do you both laugh at all the controversy or is there really a feud between you two?

B-Ray: In the beginning HD-DVD and I had a good relationship. We talked quite often, we even had each other over for party’s every now and then, but one day I saw HD-DVD on stage with Bill Gates, and he was insulting my family, calling them not necessary! I choked back my tears, and from then on I never talked to HD-DVD again. When I think what he put my family through I still get choked up. My kids come home from school crying “ PAPA, they called us unnecessary and too expensive” As far as I am concerned HD-DVD is dead to me.
AEROPAUSE: Many people claim that they are happy with DVD’s and think it’s too soon for a new standard to emerge. If you fail, what plans do you have?

B-Ray: I really do not have a back up plan right now. I dropped out of high school, so I would need to get my GED right away. In the long run I see myself running the family business. My grandfather was a betamax player so I might go work with him.

AEROPAUSE: Are you aware betamax died many many years ago!

B-Ray: WHAT! GRANDPAPA, Dad said he went to Florida to take it easy! (Blu-Ray sobs for about a half hour and asks to call his brother UMD, Blu-Ray then sobs quietly in the corner for another hour. He composes himself and we continue the interview.)

AEROPAUSE: Your dad has put a lot of money behind you, and he is counting on you to sell a lot of PS3’s. Do you feel nervous at all, or are you confident that people will embrace you with open arms?

B-Ray: Anytime our family gives birth to a new baby there will be growing pains, but I am sure with all the gamers out there wanting a system to play HD movies that my future is quite secure. It’s not like my dad would just stick me in there for no reason, right!

AEROPAUSE: So far many people have said that HD-DVD produces a better picture and therefore should be the standard we adopt. Have you seen HD-DVD’s picture quality yet, and is it really better then yours?

B-Ray: One time when we were young, HD-DVD and I played “Show Me Yours and I will Show You Mine” We got caught and we never tried it again, but what I saw was impressive, but I think mine is just as good! That moment scarred me for life. If that would not have happened I would have had a much higher capacity.

AEROPAUSE: Another criticism that HD-DVD keeps bringing up is your speed. HD-DVD says you are to slow for games and that you lack good compression. How do you respond to that?

B-Ray: In high school I tore my Achilles tendon. I was trying to show a girl how fast I could spin and I hit the wall and fell down. I had years of physical therapy and I feel that I am back at full speed now so HD-DVD can suck it! B-Ray is in the hiz-ouse!

AEROPAUSE: It will most likely take many years to decide who will win this war. What would you like to say to all the people who still don’t think that you are worth the investment?

B-Ray: I was brought into this world to do one thing, and that is to entertain the masses. I don’t want to sound conceded, but I think that I am the future of entertainment and I ask that people see past the partisan politics put forth by my contender HD-DVD, and embrace me as the dawn of a new gaming generation, because my daddy said so!

AEROPAUSE: Any final words for anybody out there?

B-Ray: Hey, HD-DVD, on November 17th you are my bitch! This one is for Grandpapa!


I would like to thank B-Ray for all his time. He had to get back to the lab, it seems that he still has a few bugs to work out. I attempted to contact HD-DVD in order to verify B-Ray’s claims, but I kept getting his answering machine. If I do make contact I will make sure and do a full interview with him and post it here.