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The 10 Girliest Video Games EVAR!
By Rakka | June 26, 2006
Girly video games are like girly drinks, pretty cute but embarrassing.
In direct response to Richard’s post about the testosterone fueled “Manliest Video Games” which regarded Arthur’s ” THE 10 MANLIEST VIDEO GAMES OF ALL TIME” post, here’s my list of the Top 10 Girliest Video Games - with much nudging from Shane (heh heh). Can you smell the estrogen? It smells like flowers.
10. Spice World– In this 1998 Playstation game, you play choreographer and manager to the girl power group. If you succeed in properly preparing the girls for the “really big show” (please say that in an Ed Sullivan voice) you can pick their camera angles and watch them perform! Squee!
9. My LIttle Pony PC Play Pack– This 2004 Atari release brings Ponyville to the PC! Help the ponies get ready for the Friendship Ball by fixing their hair, clothing and accessories. Teach them a new dance! Did I mention the ponies? This game is extra fun because it’s so pink.
8. Ladybug– Power pellets are for boys (unless it’s Ms. Pacman) In 1981’s Ladybug the object of the game is to eat dots, hearts and occasionally eat letters that spell words like “special” and “extra”. The skulls are kind of scary though.
7. Bratz Rock Angelz– Bratz Rock Angelz pwns Spice World because it’s *way* more about the fashion. This PS2 game puts you in the heels of the Bratz girls on their quest to produce their very own fashion magazine. And if that wasn’t enough, you get to cutomize their hair, make-up, and outfits! OMG!
6. Barbie– Some people might say that Barbie Horse Adventure is girlier. To that I give a resounding “nuh-uh!”. True, the horse adventure has horses and that’s really girly but in the 1991 Barbie game you get to hang out at the mall, the center of the mall, the beach, the soda shop and you can request help from animals. Who probably could wear clothes if you made them.
5. Hello Kitty Roller Rescue– Hello Kitty is cute. She also wears a lot of pink. In HK Roller Rescue you get to skate around with a magic wand zapping geometric bad guys. If you do a good job, you are rewarded with outfits and photos of your friends. Plus you get to power up by eating slices of cake. Did you hear that? Cake! So much for my diet.
4. Strawberry Shortcake Summertime– Speaking of edible powerups, Strawberry Shortcake Summetime offers them in many flavors like Apple Dash, Blueberry Bomb and Strawberry Steppers. That alone makes this game sufficently girly but there’s more! You can keep track of what you’ve done on your “To Do” list and attempt to get first place in the Strawberryland Bakeoff. Mulitasking and baking! If only there was an option to change outfits this game would be perfect!
3. Lizzie McGuire — This 2003 GBA release gets extra bonus points for not only being a game but for also helping you to plan your next party! Seriously, without Lizzie’s help, how would you EVER have come up with Charades? Gold stars and smiley faces for turning my GBA into a mini diary where I can keep track of my friend’s contact info and my horoscope and biorhythms!
2. That’s So Raven 2: Supernatural Style– Have you noticed that a lot of girly games are for portables? That’s So Raven 2 is another Disney GBA game but unlike its sister Lizzie McGuire it focuses more on psychic abilites and fashion than, say, a cyclical biological process. In this game, Raven, must use her psychic powers to get her friends and family out of sticky situations. Did I mention that she also has to collect accesories along the way to complete her fashion line? And also learn how to use a camera so she can sharpen those paparazzi skills. Oh, Raven! That’s so *her*!
1. Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter– Any game that the Frag Dolls can kick your ass at counts in my book.
Tags: female games, girl games, girly video games, top 10
Topics: Culture |
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Comment by Richard — June 26, 2006 @ 8:41 pm
Rakka you are marvelous, I had a feeling you would counter my post, well done!
Comment by Paul — June 27, 2006 @ 7:00 am
#1 = teh awesome. rakka, you rock … ah … wow, that was a bad pun.
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 9:54 am
thanks, richard! you’re quite marvelous yourself, you know!
haha! thanks, paul! that pun was t eh r0xx0r!
Comment by bgss — June 27, 2006 @ 11:03 am
If the frag dolls beating you justifies a girly game, then this list would likely just be composed of several games that they play (Halo 1/2 Rainbow Six etc..). And I think one of the staples of the frag dolls is that they are showing that not all girls are “girly”. They’re purposely doing quite the opposite.
I’m just calling “cop out” on the #1 slot, as many #1 slots do.
Comment by Hso — June 27, 2006 @ 11:06 am
I don’t see Rez
the list is incomplete!! 
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 12:50 pm
heh heh! the whole article was written for the cop out ending, bgss! hah! i’m glad you caught it!
yeah, it is incomplete, hso. sorry ’bout that.
Comment by Anonymous — June 27, 2006 @ 12:57 pm
GRAW Sucks and so do the Fag Dolls.
Comment by John H. — June 27, 2006 @ 1:02 pm
Ladybug is actually pretty hardcore.
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 1:06 pm
aw, i’m sorry, anonymous.
please don’t be *too* sick over it. ;D
yeah, ladybug actually is, john h. definately one of the better pacman clones out there!
Comment by richlb — June 27, 2006 @ 1:07 pm
ladybug is an awesome game. when i was a kid, my parents bought a colecovision for us. outside of donkey kong, ladybug was the most played game. both me and my brother loved it. didn’t realize it was girly.
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 1:09 pm
i only called it girly because of the hearts, richlib. ;D it IS a good game!
Comment by carlos — June 27, 2006 @ 7:16 pm
fuck the fragdolls ill take them on any day
Comment by carlos — June 27, 2006 @ 7:16 pm
fuck the fragdolls ill take them on any day
gamertag bobthecat23
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 7:24 pm
you doubley will, carlos! more power to you! :D!
Comment by Keith — June 27, 2006 @ 9:53 pm
HELLO, SUPER PRINCESS PEACH?
Comment by rakka — June 27, 2006 @ 9:54 pm
haha!
yeah, i know. i just returned it to gamefly this week even. sorry?
Comment by Matthias — June 27, 2006 @ 11:51 pm
That’s hilarious, thanks for the laugh!
Comment by rakka — June 28, 2006 @ 8:16 am
you’re most definately welcome, mattias!
Comment by I owned the Frag Dolls at WCVG — June 28, 2006 @ 10:41 am
That’s not what they did in GRAW over at the WCVG, they got owned there!
Comment by rakka — June 28, 2006 @ 3:19 pm
hahah!! that i did not know, owner. thanks for pointing it out!
Comment by rakka — June 30, 2006 @ 12:07 pm
oh yes! that’s a GREAT suggestion, fsk405k! samus is awesome!
Comment by Gnarkill — July 2, 2006 @ 10:29 am
Where is Halo? That game is for girls.
Comment by rakka — July 2, 2006 @ 10:41 am
mwah-haa-haa!!! :D!
Comment by Jazz — July 5, 2006 @ 9:19 pm
I’m a girl gamer and I haven’t played any of these games…way too much pink. I’m a pink hater, no offence but I see too much in ‘girly’ games. I’m surprized that games like Resident Evil or Bloodrayne aren’t listed since the main characters are girls but they’re aimed at the male gaming population. I’m a really big girly girl just not when I’m gaming. I play Alias (Xbox) a lot.
Jazz
Comment by rakka — July 5, 2006 @ 10:05 pm
thanks, jazz!
i’m a girl gamer too and i’ve not played any of the games (*mumbling* except for the “hello kitty” one.)
the article was just a joke as a response to “the manliest video games” list that made the rounds a while ago. i personally think it’s a tad silly to lump games into “male” and “female”. i prefer “good” vs “unplayable”. it’s a much more useful label. ;D
Comment by rakka — July 5, 2006 @ 10:07 pm
(oops. i’ve also played “ladybug”.
also, i didn’t mean to imply in my previous comment that male = good and female = unplayable. i just meant that labeling games with something that’s not useful (like “for boys!”) is really counterproductive.)
Comment by Samara — July 11, 2006 @ 8:27 am
I think this was a very well thought out response to the “manly video game” post. However,
It’s true, you can’t find a game better than Contra. Even after beating it like 30 times, that game is STILL fun
Comment by rakka — July 11, 2006 @ 9:31 am
thanks, Samara!
and, yes. i agree with you. contra is still an awesome game! :D!
Comment by Ravenrogue — July 11, 2006 @ 10:18 am
I was ready to get a bit offended until I got to number one. Then I laughed. This list makes me smile now. xD Even if I haven’t played any of the first nine. Sorry, more of a survival horror and fighting game addict.
Comment by Anonymous — July 11, 2006 @ 11:23 am
haha! well, i’m glad you enjoyed number one! :D! yeah, i’m more of a cult and fighting gamer myself. (oh, and retro. i luuurves the retro.) survival horror is lots of fun too!
Comment by rakka — July 11, 2006 @ 11:25 am
oops. that anonymous post was from me, btw. someone needs coffee before they use the interwebs! ;D
Comment by gamertag: aneurysm13 — July 11, 2006 @ 12:02 pm
frag dolls are no match for me! i totally pwn them
Comment by rakka — July 11, 2006 @ 1:33 pm
hooray! :D!
Comment by Charles in Charge — July 11, 2006 @ 4:00 pm
Haha, I’m just posting to say it amuses me how Rakka deals with classic contentious internet a-holes who keep making “threats” towards the frag dolls.
Cheers.
Comment by Kaori — July 12, 2006 @ 1:00 am
Oh boy… i dont even play half these games i play rpg style like gta. O_o; and im a girl as well… ^_^ but Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter Is good… o_o; yep. AND WHATS UP WITH SPICE GIRLS omg like so ninties. but ninties music was awesome. *misses the ninties*
Comment by Kaori — July 12, 2006 @ 1:03 am
Zelda also owned. ^_^ Kaori sorry for double post. Jak I, II, III, X, and Daxter are good. I play the sims as well that could be considered a vertual doll house.
Comment by rakka — July 12, 2006 @ 8:21 am
haha! thanks, charles! i’m glad it makes you laugh! :D!
hey, kaori! no need to worry about the double post. i don’t think that there are many of us that DID play those games! haha! i agree with you on all of your game choices esp the “jak and daxter” series! :D!
er, sims is more like a horror game the way i play it… *sounds of crickets* *cough* (haha)
the one major affect that writing this had on me was that i had spice girls songs stuck in my head! *laughing!*
Comment by nealson lewison — July 12, 2006 @ 10:14 am
Rakka great list and i love the way you handled the haters of your article…. great stuff… but did anyone notice that animal crossing was a honorable mention for manliest games? wtf? (i am a man and i play Animal crossing for ds) but not very manly at all… lol great list for gurls tho
Comment by Anonymous — July 25, 2006 @ 9:51 am
WTC?!?!? Ghost recon was rated “m”, also it was in the top 10 games of 2005 and ‘06. If that’s a girly game because of frag dolls, then I’d better stop playing Halo, or maybe i’ll grow pigtails.
Comment by rakka — July 25, 2006 @ 10:35 am
pigtails are cute on guys, anony! :D!
(i just think games are games. if they’re fun to play, they’re for everyone, you know?)
oh! and thanks, nealson lewison! maybe “animal crossing” is manly because of…uh…no, i’ve got nothing. hahah! (in truth, i know lots of guys that play ac. they just don’t admit it publically.)
Comment by Lauren — July 31, 2006 @ 9:34 pm
This is a great list of girly games and bratz rock angelz is one of m fav games evah but one game that should definitly be on here is Harvest Moon: Another Wonderful Life. If you have played Harvest moom: A wonderful Life, then you know that these games are awesome. ANWL(Another Wonderful Life) Is the womans equivalent to AWL(A Wonderful Life). Both are when you take over a farm but one you’re a girl who finds love,a family, and happieness, and the other is about a boy who finds love, a family, and happieness. Get the picture? If you make another you HAVE to add ANWL!!!!!!!!!!!! And trust me, I know what i’m talking about.
-Lauren, age 13, California
Comment by rakka — August 2, 2006 @ 1:42 pm
thanks, lauren!
i’ll have to play anwl since i haven’t yet! i believe you when you say you know what you’re talking about! ;D
Comment by Katie Collins — August 4, 2006 @ 12:35 pm
hey whats up I really want to play Barbie games com. im only ten years old sothats everythng
Comment by rakka — August 4, 2006 @ 3:42 pm
you should totally play barbie games if you want, katie! :D!
Comment by Gigi417 — August 5, 2006 @ 11:27 am
I have never had so much fun procrastinating on homework as I am having right now. Both sides of the ‘Top Ten’ were absolutely hilarious. I felt the ‘manly list’ was entirely perfect from top to bottom (coming from many lonely nights due to a boyfriend who loves every one of those games - and I don’t blame him) and your ‘girly’ list was the perfect comeback.
Thanks for the laughs!
Comment by rakka — August 5, 2006 @ 2:01 pm
thanks so much, gigi! :D!
always glad to help someone procrastinate! haha!
Comment by Radjago — August 11, 2006 @ 5:28 am
This list is severely lacking in Super Princess Peach for the Nintendo DS. What other game can you win by crying?
Comment by Anonymous — August 24, 2006 @ 12:52 pm
I find that Barbie games are very funny for little girl. I saw many smiles on their faces while they were playing with Barbie. This is not a blog for men or boys.
Comment by Anonymous — August 24, 2006 @ 1:59 pm
omfg, ghost recon in top 1, how silly it’s ??
Comment by nikki — September 17, 2006 @ 11:38 am
lol they got it pretty straight
Comment by walther — September 17, 2006 @ 3:03 pm
women who play FPS are seriously hot. too bad GRAW blows *shrug*
Comment by William Sun — October 3, 2006 @ 9:37 am
Haha, that was great! ;D
Comment by Gina Mcnamara — June 14, 2007 @ 7:02 am
This one makes sence “One’s first step in wisdom is to kuesstion everything - and one’s last is to come to terms with everything.”
Comment by klinofdoom — June 24, 2007 @ 2:27 pm
GRAW was pretty terrible. But there’s no doubt: just because a girl is lucky enough to beat a guy at a game, it doesn’t mean it’s a girly game. GRAW is definitely a game for men, not girls (no matter what the Frag Dolls want to say, or any other woman for that matter - btw, the Frag Dolls BLOW). The rest of those choices are definitely games for girls though. Would have made more sense if you put Bejeweled at the top of the list, seeing as how I see women all the time playing this game and nothing else.
Comment by Eric — July 2, 2007 @ 3:23 am
Hey man just because your a fagg and dont like that game doesnt mean that you can name it girliest game and i could own the faggdolls at that game its meant for one species… thats right man not women but they’re welcome to play if they want
Comment by Roger Malone — October 9, 2007 @ 7:35 pm
I think this one doesn’t make any sense: breungles, mentioned somewhere
Comment by ravran2 — April 18, 2008 @ 5:27 am
WHat? Can’t believe it! Where was Male Invaders? The game where girlie types get to shoot all those nasty things that me do, you know, sport, cars, toilet seat left up …
The address is something like myinvaders.com
R
Comment by penny — July 29, 2008 @ 10:06 pm
ladybug is an awesome game. Tiffany & Co 3 OPEN HEART Necklace Tiffany & Co 5 OPEN HEART Necklace